Three Thoughts

1. Today I thought it would be a good idea to spread bug killer in my yard while it was raining outside. It was going very well until I slipped on a muddy slope and caught myself on the AC unit outside. I'm so thankful I didn't hit my head. I'm so nervous about "brain bleed"...whatever that is.

Normally if this happens you put a band aid on it and move along on your merry little way. When you are a million rounds into chemo it becomes more of a "thing". So my doctor wants me to take twice a day antibiotics and come in for a tetanus shot, just to be on the safe side. You'd hate for me to fighting this big bad cancer and then die of tetanus or something else entirely preventable. So there's that...

2. I braved the social security office today. I didn't wear any make up, wore just a ball cap, and brought the baby. Com'n who wouldn't want to give me some Obama money?? Turned out I picked the perfect time to go - 2:30pm, on a Tuesday, when it was raining. There was no one there! I got super fast service and the folks were super helpful. Apparently when you have a really bad disease and you are clearly going to get approved for disability, they fast track you through the process. It is something called Compassionate Allowances. We'll see how long the process takes, but yay for potentially free disability monies and being on the list of really bad diseases that get quick service...wait, um...

3. I think multiple times a day how awesome my life is. I love my husband, my kids, my home, my friends, my parents, even my in-laws. Life is so good right now. This is a really fun and special season in my life. I'm really enjoying getting this extra long maternity leave with David as he starts to come alive smiling and giggling. And I would normally say, "Life is good...except for the cancer part." But that really isn't true either. Life is good, because of the cancer part. It makes all the other parts come alive and become that much more special. I cherish all the good parts of my life because I see how quickly it could all vanish. I have connected with so many people over this trial in my life. People I would have never known or them have a reason to know me. I have seen the best in my friends and family. I feel so incredibly loved and beautiful- more so than any other time in my life. So yeah, I have this "terrible cancer" but really in the day-to-day, I couldn't be more content.